Your Week in Seriously Times: Sept. 16 – 22, 2012

Jesus Christ! Superstarrrr! Do ye think ye be what they say ye arrrrr?

Values voters, spiders, Mrs. of Nazareth, pirate medicine, Toddler Wine, and ageless hobbits — it’s not Kevin J. Anderson’s planned Lord of the Rings sequel, but this week’s topics on SeriouslyGuys. Here’s the recap:

  • Rick Santorum reminds “economic conservative and libertarian types” that they’re not “elite, smart people.” (His words, not mine.) Something about the company they keep that sets the platform they vote for. (Sept. 17, 2012)
  • Guam swallowed snakes to get the birds, swallowed the birds to get the spiders — that wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her(Sept. 18, 2012)
  • Jesus may have had a wife. He doesn’t mention her parents, though, who wanted her to marry a doctor, not a carpenter. Bonus: it be Talk like a Pirate Day! (Sept. 19, 2012)
  • Ask Dr. Snee: We get to the bottom of several vexin’ pirate medical myths. Do ye have enough rum in yer first aid kit, mateys? (Sept. 19, 2012)
  • Moms know that the easiest way to get to know their kids is over a drink. The Guys are here to help … by launching our sequel to Baby Merlot: Toddler Wine. (Sept. 20, 2012)
  • J.R.R. Tolkein’s The Hobbit turned 75 this week and owes its continued relevance to hungover 6th grade teachers that managed to sign out an A/V cart before napping out. (Sept. 21, 20120)

Your Week in Seriously Times: Jun. 17 – 23, 2012

Haboob haikus, spear guns, Baby Merlot, fat salad, and gay Republicans — counter-intuition was this week’s theme on SeriouslyGuys. Here’s the recap:

  • You just know that it’s images like this that made the inventor of x-ray machines get out of bed every morning. (Jun. 19, 2012)
  • Can I buy you and your baby a drink? Yes, according to the Danishes. (Jun. 20, 2012)
  • GOProud may be a Republican organization for gay people, but that doesn’t mean gay issues are a priority. Just like how women’s groups will tolerate an occasional slap if you buy groceries. (Jun. 22, 2012)

Your Week in Seriously Times: Dec. 25 – 31, 2011

It's because they eat a good breakfast every morning and never sleep.

This week: bad mothers, unstoppable New Yorkers, the end of calendars as we know them and the clap! It’s not the end of the world, just the end of another week on SeriouslyGuys … and also the end of the year. Here’s the recap:

  • Science unveiled their latest analogy, “bad fathers : slutty teens :: bad mothers : fat teens.” (Dec. 27, 2011)
  • An astrophysicist and an economist invent a new calendar. That’s the joke. (Dec. 29, 2011)
  • Christopher Columbus invented mercantilism. He took raw syphilis from the New World back to Europe, where they refined it into the brain-eating sex parasite we all know and love today, then sold it back to the colonies in the form of Kinder eggs and empanadas. (Dec. 30, 2011)