Your Week in Seriously Times: Aug. 26 – Sep. 1, 2012

Cut or uncut?

Foreskin, Bigfoot, hangmen, Will.i.am, and beer — the weekly recap of SeriouslyGuys posts returns with a bang. (Not that I didn’t post on SeriouslyGuys those other weeks. I’ve just been a little too busy to post them up here.) Anywho, here’s the recap:

  • There’s a foreskin on your dick; no, there’s not. And American pediatricians say that’s OK. (Aug. 27, 2012)
  • A man who tried to impersonate Bigfoot by wearing a ghillie suit was run over by some teens. Scooby and the gang do. not. fuck. around. (Aug. 28, 2012)
  • Having trouble finding work? Sri Lanka needs a new h _ _ g m _ _. (Aug. 29, 2012)
  • Take it from Snee: ♪ NASA gets retarded, ha! NASA gets retarded, in here!(Aug. 29, 2012)
  • The quickest way to a man’s stomach is through a curvy glass. (Aug. 31, 2012)

NASA’s Newest Mission: Relevancy

In 2008, NASA beamed a recording of The Beatles’ “Across the Universe” into space. Four years, a severely cut budget and no response later, they’ve taken a new tack: assaulting Mars with Will.i.am. And make no mistake: a sonic bombardment of auto-tuned Black-Eyed Pea is just that, an assault, perhaps meant to drive lifeforms out of hiding so they’ll try to turn the stereo off. Or even just pound on the ceilings of their subterranean lairs with a broom handle. Any reaction that gives them away will do, really.

History will remember this as the catalyzing moment that led to robots’ rights.

So, how did we arrive at this point, where America’s space agency has mohawks and Mars rovers with twitter accounts? With the end of manned space missions, NASA has embraced a new goal: cultural relevancy.

You can’t blame them. When 46 percent — nearly half — of Americans believe in strictly creationism and a sitting member of the House Committee on Science, Space and Technology doesn’t know how rape works (and yet has an opinion about it), it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that nobody cares about space exploration unless we find God a la Star Trek V.

Good for you, NASA. You cracked the code to making the news cycles and, maybe one day, more money. But, where do you go from here? I’m glad you asked … Continue reading NASA’s Newest Mission: Relevancy