Your Week in Seriously Times: Nov. 25 – Dec. 1 , 2012

Snee’s Enemy Number Un, riding a meal for twenty North Koreans.

Nazi pigeons, born again child actors, sexy Korean dictators, Florida, and NYC homicides — there really is no logical connector for this week’s topics on SeriouslyGuys. Our world is strange and wonderful, indeed. Here’s the recap:

  • The British found an undelivered coded message strapped to a disembodied pigeon leg from World War II. The double-agent is suspected of having flown the coup to Argentina, nursing a flesh wound. (Nov. 26, 2012)
  • It turns out that when God closes a door, he opens a window for you to rant out of. (Nov. 27, 2012)
  • Unlike his father and grandfather, Kim Jong Un doesn’t rely on his own propaganda teams to invent new achievements. (Nov. 28, 2012)
  • Take it from Snee: Florida has yet to get democracy right after flubbing it in 2000, much less handle a Department of Health sex survey. Perhaps we should cut our losses at Georgia. (Nov. 28, 2012)
  • New Yorkers couldn’t manage to kill each other even by accident for 36 hours. (Nov. 29, 2012)

Your Week in Seriously Times: Sept. 23 – 29, 2012

“Long time” turned out to be measured in Chris Farley years.

Sex dolls, eunuchs, dolphins, Opposite Day, Canadians, and Ahmadinejad — if wet nightmares were a thing, this would be one. Alas, they’re just the topics this week on SeriouslyGuys. Here’s the recap:

  • Rescue workers are getting very good at retrieving drowned sex dolls. They’d save one if giving them mouth-to-mouth didn’t taste funny. (Sept. 24, 2012)
  • Korean eunuchs lived longer than their swingin’ peers. In other news: accidentally sitting on your balls can kill you. (Sept. 25, 2012)
  • If you fed Beggar the dolphin, come claim your share of the prize. (Sept. 26, 2012)
  • Take it from Snee: Either Wednesday was Opposite Day, or frat brothers squirting Sutter Home up each others asses is now acceptable. Or wasting food. Or wishing referees a good day. (Sept. 26, 2012)
  • Ha ha! U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon still believes there’s a Canadian Prime Minister! Also: Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad takes stereotypes very seriously in his War on Jewishness. (Sept. 28, 2012)

Your Week in Seriously Times: Jul. 29 – Aug. 4, 2012

Chicken sandwiches and the Olympics — those were the topics I managed to hit this week on SeriouslyGuys. Unlike the other news outlets, I only wrote about each topic once. Here’s the recap:

  • Fox News isn’t saying you should be ashamed of supporting a sandwich that funds “Kill the Gays” bills in Uganda. But they are saying that you could maybe pirate it if your morals can’t win out over your chicken sandwich addiction, fatty. (Jul. 31, 2012)