Your Week in Seriously Times: Apr. 15 – 21, 2012

Kids say the fuckingest things.

Zombie prep, handcuffed kids, sleeping babies, and sex robots … It’s not the next The Next Phillip K. Dick novelist, but this week’s SeriouslyGuys posts. Here’s the recap:

• Fun Fact: Two-thirds* of everyone you know will become zombies should the worst happen. Now look to your left and right at the shooting range or at the starting line of your next zombie run. (Apr. 16, 2012)

• Handcuffs on kids may seem cruel and unusual, but name a better way to keep them from picking their noses. (Apr. 17, 2012)

• Never wake a sleeping baby. Unless, you know, you’re insane. (Apr. 18, 2012)

• Take it from Snee: Could you survive the gauntlet that is our federal court system? Find out in the dramatic conclusion to my three-part series, Explaining the U.S. Branches of Government to Foreigners and Children. This week: it’s the judicial branch! (Apr. 18, 2012)

• Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. The money’s on the dresser. (Apr. 20, 2012)

*This and many more statistics brought to you by My Ass. My Ass: because what goes into my head must come out somewhere.