Your Week in Seriously Times: Feb. 5 – 11, 2012

I also appointed my Supreme Court Dream Team: Florida Judge John Hurley as Chief Justice and eight clones of Judge Hurley.

The finger, blood clots, spanking, court-ordered dates, lying doctors, and bullet-ridden laptops; it looks like everybody had it in for you this week. Here’s the recap if you survived:

  • You know the culture war’s over when the PTC focuses on an errant finger in the middle of the most gay-friendly Super Bowl halftime show since Up With People. (Feb. 6, 2012)
  • Just when you think the airline industry has cut out all complimentary services in coach, they find one more to take away: blood clots. (Feb.7, 2012)
  • Canadian scientists discover kids are like a faulty television: smacking it may fix undesirable behavior in the short term, maybe even knock some dust off, but your Samsung is still broken and probably even more so now. (Feb. 8, 2012)
  • Take it from Snee: Red Lobster got just about the worst endorsement it never asked for. (Feb. 8, 2012)
  • A dad shoots his teenage daughter’s laptop after she posts mean things about him on Facebook so that she’ll never do it again. In other news, the MPAA believes they’ve finally licked their Internet piracy problem. (Feb. 10, 2012)

*Joke credit goes to online compadre, Abel Undercity.

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